Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Blog 9- The Attack

I sat the morning after the dance gazing out towards the phosphorescent water. I thought about last night. The way all those boys stifled Simon. I looked over at Ralph. His eyes lost their usual twinkle. Ralph cleared his throat and murmured something. "What'd you say?" I asked.
"Simon," he said. I nodded. It wasn't just me. Ralph knew too that it was Simon lying there not the beast. I shuddered when I thought about Jack and his hunters. Clawing and stabbing Simon.
"That was murder." said Ralph quietly.
" Why are you saying that, of course it was an accident." I said it but I didn't believe it. I knew that it was dark and there was a storm. But knowing Jack, it didn't matter how dark it was. He might not have known it was Simon but even if he did, that wouldn't have stopped him.

Later on I was awoken by a quiet voice whispering, "Piggy, Piggy." Immediately I thought of the beast. "Piggy, come here Piggy," Then my heart shook. My lungs tightened and I started gasping for air. I would suck in as hard as I could but my lungs would only close up more. My chest felt smothered with pressure even though nothing was actually there. The beast was here. It came for me. Then three bodies came inside our shelter. The fear of the beast was gone but my asthma wouldn't stop. I tried to be gesticulate and show Ralph that I was having trouble breathing but me motioning had no use in the dark. I could here people fighting but I could see nothing. Then it stopped. The six silhouettes turned to three. It had been Jack and his hunters. They came for something, but what? I reached to my left for my glasses. I felt around on the sand but my hand came back empty. They took my specs. I thought silently. 

2 comments:

QuinnB said...

Sianni-

I really like your first paragraph it seems like something straight out of the book. I really liked how you used the word stifle; "The way all those boys stifled Simon."

One thing I think would imporve your writing would be adding more desctiption of what Jack sounded like outside the tent.

-Quinn

hunter said...

I am not sure you used stifle the right way, but i did really like the ending. Especially how you made that one sentence stand out. I could totally understand how he felt. -hunter